What Frightens You and What Do You Consider a Monster?
Fear. It’s something we all know, yet it's hard to put into words. There are times it creeps up on us, leaving us frozen in place, unable to act or even think clearly. But where does fear come from, and what really frightens you? Is it the obvious dangers, or is it something deeper, hidden within us all?
I’ve asked myself this question countless times, and I think it's something every one of us faces, whether we admit it or not. We all have our monsters—some tangible, some abstract, but all powerful in their own way. So let me ask you: What frightens you? And what do you consider a monster?
What Frightens You?
I think the earliest memory I have of fear comes from a nightmare I had in kindergarten. I dreamed of a Bigfoot chasing me down the street, and I remember running into my bedroom, hiding under my bed. I was just a kid, but that fear—of being chased, of being caught—has stuck with me. That physical sensation of panic, the moment your breath catches and you feel like you can’t move, is something I’ve carried into adulthood.
As I’ve gotten older, fear has become more nuanced. It’s not just the boogeyman in the closet or the storm on the horizon. No, the fear I feel now isn’t always something I can see. It’s the feeling that something’s just out of reach, something I can’t control. The fear of losing someone, the thought of something terrible happening to my loved ones. It’s that moment before a rollercoaster drops, where your stomach lifts and you can’t breathe.
Fear, for me, has always been about the loss of control. That inability to act, to do something about what’s coming. It’s like that feeling of being held captive by your own thoughts, trapped in a space where you can’t escape.
What Is a Monster?
Monsters, we often think, are things that look monstrous. But I’ve come to realize that monsters don’t always have sharp teeth or claws. Sometimes they are the things we can’t see. Sometimes, they’re the shadows lurking in our own minds.
I’ve learned that the real monsters are the things we carry within us. The shame, the self-doubt, the regret. The inner monsters that whisper we’re not enough, that we’ve done something unforgivable. For me, my personal monster has always been myself. I've spent so much time reflecting on the past—on my actions, my relationships—and wondering if I was the one who caused the harm, if I was the monster in my own story.
In my trilogy, I’ve written about characters like Rowan and Lenny—these larger-than-life figures that seem to embody evil. But when I think about monsters, I see them as a reflection of the darkness inside us. The things we allow to control us. The things we hide from.
Monsters in Literature and Life
In literature, monsters are often the physical embodiment of fear—tangible threats that the protagonist must face and conquer. But the monsters in Maleficia and my writing are always more than that. They are the struggles we cannot see—the inner wars we fight with ourselves, the battle between what’s right and what we’re tempted to do.
A monster isn’t just a creature from the dark. It can be something as simple as doubt, fear, or guilt. The true battle isn’t always with the villain you can point to, but with the thoughts that keep you up at night.
Conclusion: Confronting Our Monsters
When I was younger, I was terrified of spiders. I’d run the other way at the sight of one, convinced it was out to get me. But one day, I found myself face-to-face with a little jumping spider, and for the first time, I didn’t react with terror. I just watched it, and in that moment, I realized something: the spider wasn’t the monster. My fear of it was.
I got curious. I learned that some spiders can be dangerous, but only if you put yourself in their space. And with that knowledge, my fear faded. I confronted my monster. And in doing so, I took away its power over me.
I believe that’s what we all need to do with the things that frighten us—the monsters in our lives. We need to confront them, shine a light on them, and understand them. Because once we do, they lose their hold over us. Fear thrives in the unknown, but knowledge—understanding—takes away its power.
So, I ask you again: what frightens you? And what do you consider a monster? Take a moment to think about it, because I think the more we face our fears, the less we let them define us.